My sweet friend Deanna George posts this to my Facebook wall recently, and shared with me that it may be the most perfect description of my children. She can say this because she knows them….and me. In order for you to understand its truth, I thought it be only fair to properly introduce you to The Trainwreck Two.
Benjamin who is a bright shiny new 5 year old is my “informant” child…..I was blessed with such a child for reasons that will come shortly. He is very bright, very intuitive, overly observant and has a knack for pointing out the obvious. Even when not requested. While at the lake this summer, I asked my potty training 2 year old (we’ll get to her) why she had peed in her panties, in the water, “Because Mommy, there isn’t a potty out here”. Thank you Benjamin.
Last year so proud to finally be dressing himself, I struggled with how to explain things like not wearing the same pair of socks for 3 days, that generally we don’t wear dress shoes with a track suit, and though I understand how much you love your new suit vest, this is not proper school attire.
Maybe my favorite Benjamin moment came while he getting ready for school one morning, he had proudly dressed himself in 2 different Christmas socks, a Buzz Lightyear shirt and new “big boy” boxer briefs and he runs out to “inform” me that his underwear had a “POCKET!” (in the front)…..I sighed and said, let’s wait until Daddy comes home to talkmore about that pocket. In the meantime, let’s keep that pocket free of toys and snacks. As time goes on, his ability to dress himself has improved, and that has come with the confidence to look at me in church one morning and say “I look even handsomer than these other people”. Sigh. Remind me to talk to you about things we keep to ourselves…..And, just when I begin to remind myself that steam can’t REALLY come out of your ears like an old Looney Tunes cartoon? This conversation happens:
Me: Benjamin, dude! Grab a napkin; don’t wipe Doritos on your shirt!
Benjamin: Mommy, the reason my shirt is brown is so that the orange doesn’t show.
Me: Thank you Benjamin for your logic, *smile…..NOW GET A NAPKIN! *smile.
Meanwhile, in the other corner, I’ve heard having a 2-year old is like running a blender without a lid? Who can relate to that? I CAN, I CAN! Having a Maya makes me wish there was alcohol in that blender! Maya Rose is 2 ½ years of bouncy, sassy, hard-headed, big-hearted, sandy bottomed mischief who doesn’t feel that she should wear panties, ever. My day is not complete until I have found myself saying “why aren’t you wearing panties?” at least 5 times.
SHE is the reason God blessed me with an informant child. My money is on her, always……Dear older brother who just informed me that Maya COLORED IN HIS EAR! Please remember that you have 2 feet and at least 20 lbs on her. Sincerely, Mom Yep, gonna be a rough few years for my son. Poor guy.
She rarely matches, hair is always a mess (yep, I just broke into singing a Train song, did you?) and there is a drum out there that only she can hear the beat to. Concepts like not wearing stripes and polka dots together and socks that match have completely passed her by and NO ONE will dare to correct the beautiful mess that is Maya Rose.
No one ever said parenting is easy, in fact, something I sometimes wonder why on earth any sane woman would take it on more than once. I mean, on a scale of 1 to 10, how bad of a mom am I that I found great amusement in my son getting his thumb caught and stuck in a jar that his hands should have never been in?? You’re right, I’m not because if you’re anything like me, you know….a parent…..then you have been there too. But, when I tuck the little trainwreck in each night, I am grateful for them, totally unprepared for the next mess and most importantly, ready to grab the corkscrew!